Earlier this week it was reported that the AP had turned down a purchase offer by Pet Holdings Inc., best known for the amazingly successful LOLCat’s site I Can Has Cheeseburger. Of all the efforts to Rescue The Future of Journalism™, this was by far the least expected and easily my favorite. As the LA Times put it:
But if AP had started to consider it (or something like it) a decade ago they would have been a lot smarter about than anyone else in the news business. Today Pet Holdings makes money like newspapers used to. That’s because in addition to I Can Has Cheeseburger, they own a bunch of other equally serious sites, like the LOLDogs site I Has A Hotdog, and the LOLNews site Pundit Kitchen. (In the interests of full disclosure I must admit to regularly reading Cheeseburger and Hotdog.) Pet Holdings is able to make money the way it does because 99.9% of its content is generated by its readers, so all the company has to do is generate revenue from its amazing traffic numbers. I’ve been meaning to write about their marketing deal with the Seattle Mariners for far too long. They regularly sponsor lolcats nights at the ballpark which, I suspect, greatly increases attendance for the last-place Mariners.
Pet Holdings, like the newspapers of the past, has a virtual monopoly on its very loyal readership. The fact that that readership is idiots like me apparently hasn’t hurt them. While I totally respect the AP and their reasons for passing on this deal, this is the kind of totally unexpected move that will finally Rescue The Future Of Journalism™.
Best quote comes from alleged feng shui expert Simona Mainini, “It’s very experimental. We don’t have any books on feng shui for monkeys. [note to self: write book called Feng Shui for Monkeys] We just have to assume that Darwin is correct and that there is a connection and what is good for humans is good for monkeys.”
Oh please leave poor Charles out of this. I could be wrong but I don’t think he had anything to say on the topic of assinine human superstitions being applied to enclosures for feces-throwing species.
Wait, I am wrong about one thing. Feng shui does actually prove one scientific law — the one about the velocity at which a fool is parted from his money.
BTW, shame on the AP for not including a single person mocking the idea that feng shui is anything but nonsense. If they ever need anyone I’m always available. And my credentials are every bit as good as Ms. Mainini.
WASHINGTON (AP) – The Federal Trade Commission on Monday said it found 15 examples of gasoline price gouging after Hurricane Katrina, though the agency said it has not identified any widespread effort by the oil industry to illegally manipulate the marketplace.The agency sought to downplay the instances of price gouging by seven refiners, two wholesalers and six retailers, chalking up their soaring prices in September 2005 to "regional or local market trends."
For the purpose of the report, and as mandated by Congress, the FTC defined price gouging as "any finding" that the average price of gasoline in designated disaster areas in September 2005 was higher than in August 2005.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) – An investigation by U.S. antitrust authorities found no evidence that oil companies illegally manipulated gasoline prices or constrained oil refining operations, the Federal Trade Commission said on Monday.
However, the agency said it had found 15 examples that fit lawmakers' definition of price-gouging at the "refining, wholesale, or retail level." It said factors like regional and local market trends appeared to explain the pricing in nearly all the cases.
And speaking of headlines … this was the AP's headline on the Enron trial from yesterday Skilling Tells Enron Jury He's 'Innocent' Why the quotes around innocent? Are they implying that he was being ironic? In which case italics and a big wink are the way to go.
From USA Today: Should business execs meet at strip clubs?
Congrats, though to the reporter for finding someone soused enough to answer in the affirmative: Attorney Rohit Sabharwal, a Rick’s Cabaret regular, says he often takes clients of his small law firm with him and such entertaining was common when he was at a large firm, too. “Nobody really objects,” Sabharwal says. “I think it’s a lot more civilized in the law profession. I don’t think women have a problem succeeding in law firms.” You wanna bet Rohit is regretting this?