iPhone apps are the bleeding edge of marketing mistakes

The iPhone’s apps have been a marketing problem for Apple pretty much since they debuted. The problem is really that Apple wants to approve of all apps before they go on the store. This would be fine, if there was a consistent or even coherent policy guiding what goes in and what doesn’t.

This week’s examples:

Apple has removed an iPhone app from its online store created by Exodus International, an anti-gay religious organization that promotes the idea that homosexuality can be “cured.” … The app, launched in mid-February, initially received a 4+ approval rating from Apple, meaning it did not contain any “objectionable material.” … The app provided users with an event calendar, podcasts, video, “real answers,” “real stories” and links to Twitter and Facebook, and was designed to “be a useful resource for men, women, parents, students and ministry leaders.” … “We removed the Exodus International app from the app store because it violates the developer guidelines by being offensive to large groups of people,” Apple spokesperson Tom Neumayr told FoxNews.com.

SOMEONE APPROVED THIS? Are they hiring from the Westboro Baptist Church? Possible explanation: There is either a very stupid algorithm or person responsible for vetting these apps. And Apple takes the hit for it because they make it clear they are control freaks who get final OK. Google, however, says we will take something down if we get told about it: “While Google does not intend, and does not undertake, to monitor the Products or their content, if Google is notified …” Because Apple’s guidelines for what is acceptable in an app are  basically, “It depends,” they are guaranteed to continue to run into this problem.

Which leads us to example #2:

Senators: DUI checkpoint apps are “harmful to public safety” … The apps in question range from those that try to put DUI checkpoints on a map in real time to those that help users alert one another about police on the prowl for drunk drivers. One app that we found in the iOS App Store called “Checkpointer” specifically advertises its $4.99 offering as being able to save you “thousands of dollars by helping you avoid an arrest for a DUI.” (The company that sells Checkpointer also offers bail bonds, so it’s clear which demographic this company is catering to.) Another app called “Buzzed” says it will alert you when a DUI checkpoint shows up or is planned for your area, though it also offers a “call a cab” service based on your GPS location.

SOMEONE APPROVED THIS?

Meanwhile, those two having already been approved, Steve Jobs himself killed an app for detecting radiation – created by cell phones: “Tawkon, makers of a mobile application that measures cellular radiation, have been blocked from releasing their app for iPhone. In response, the company on Wednesday released the tawkon app for iPhone via the Cydia jailbreak.” Is there an app that turns the iPhone into a general-use Geiger counter? If so I know at least one major market for it.

For those of   you not keeping score, a few of Apples other app mistakes:

• Apple rescinds cancelling cartoonist’s app after he wins a Pulitzer
• Apple bans & then brings back some boob apps
• 10 Apps Apple changed its mind about (Apple is particularly sensitive about apps that show scantily clad women … unless you are the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.)

 

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Beijing unveils cartoon cops to police surfing habits

Police in China’s capital said Tuesday will start patrolling the Web using animated beat officers that pop up on a user’s browser and walk, bike or drive across the screen warning them to stay away from illegal Internet content.

Suddenly the phrase “blue screen of death” takes on a whole new meaning. Oddly the police aren’t wearing Google or Yahoo logos.  C’mon, guys! Sponsorship opportunity!

Weird moments in censorship

Cartoon Network is re-running episodes of Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. They’re being shown after 11 as part of their “Adult Swim” package of cartoons for grown-ups. Pee Wee’s Playhouse was originally a Saturday morning show. What’s changed since when it first ran and now? Paul Reuben’s getting busted for “enjoying himself” in a movie theater. Not quite sure how that changes the content of the show though.

Even odder than that: Watching an episode of Dr. 90210, the “reality” show about plastic surgery, when they show a transsexual’s change from male to female. Now the show usually blurs out a woman’s nipples when they show, men’s nipples are allowed to be seen sans blur. So halfway through the operation, as the doctor slips the saline pouches into the patients breasts they start blurring out the nipples we had previously been allowed to view. Who made that call? How many meetings were held to determine exactly at what moment the nipple goes from viewable to Janet Jackson?