Company introduces “Sarah-Cuda” hunting bow

What’s pink, cuddly and can bring down a moose or at least a Biden? The GOP hopes it’s Sarah Palin, they might want to invest in Lakota Industries adorable new hunting bow. While the pink camo is certainly fitting  … you really have to hope anything your hunting is color blind. Or maybe it will distract Dick Cheney if you ever have to go hunting with the current VP.

Other potential candidate/product tie ins:

  • The Joe Biden Leaf Blower — How much hot air do you need?
  • The John McCain Pistol Holster — Allows you to shoot from the hip and automatically hit your own foot.
  • Barack Obama Holy Water — Everybody keeps telling me he can perform miracles.
Are Bidens in season?

Are Bidens in season?

Nice move: The company will donate 10 percent of Sarah-Cuda proceeds to the National Association for Down Syndrome.

U.S. escalates war on concepts: “The enemy is extremism”

pogoIn an interview on NPR Gen. David Petraeus showed that logic is not a required course at the Army War college:

Q: A simple question that many in America are now wrestling with: Who is the enemy and what is the U.S. fighting for?

A: The enemy is extremism, we think, and it is extremism that comes in various forms.

I forget, is it the infantry or the artillery who are trained in extreme combat?

Isn’t moderation the best weapon against extremism? But if you do it too well you run the risk of being extremely moderate.

If the enemy is extremism does this mean we’re about to attack the X Games?

Maybe we could attack marketers who use the word extreme when ever they want to appear “hip” and “down” with the kids these days?

I look forward to the Armed Forces blowing up statues of Sen. Barry Goldwater who famously said that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice.

Isn’t going to war a very extreme act?

One definition of extremism is “any political theory favoring immoderate uncompromising policies.” Invade the vice president’s office immediately.

This reminds me of something George Bush the elder said during the first Iraq contretemps: “We are fighting to prove that might does not make right.”

The war on extremism makes the war on terror look good.

Cheney “going hunting” on Election Day

So there’s another euphemism for getting drunk. When that guy does a few shots … he really does a few shots! (Rim shot, please…) OK, so the man is going to be armed, imbibed, already in a bad mood over whatever goes wrong in Iraq tomorrow and facing a likely major loss at the polls — are you brave enough to get in the duck blind with him? Oh, and yes, this is the first time since his last shooting incident that the Veep has directly taken up arms against a living thing. Put the Spinmeisters on high alert. Congrats to some Colorado Pro-Pot group for putting down the oreos long enough to come up with the above ad.

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Thursday’s headline of the day: Hollywood sex scenes attract lawmakers’ attention

The rest of us, however, are immune.

Runner up for the award: Dust Storm Hits Baghdad … if only because it could then be followed up with “BAGHDAD (AP) — Administration officials denied any link between the huge storm that has enveloped this strife-torn city and recent bomb attacks.” Or there’s the FOX TV version: “Administration officials pointed to press coverage of the storm as yet another example of negative news being blown out of proportion by the media. Following the announcement Dick Cheney complained that all this dirt was interfering with his aim.”

Elsewhere in press news: It’s always been said that any semi-competent chimp could be a reporter, how about a semi-competent chip? As in micro. Quoth the AP:

Professors at the University of Minnesota have turned the fantasy computer game “Neverwinter Nights” into a tool for journalism students. Instead of slaying monsters and gathering gold, the players tackle sources and gather information. When we initially did the game, it still had lava pits, the editor looked like an ogre — stuff like that. The librarian had breastplates,” said Nora Paul, director of the university’s Institute for New Media Studies.

Sounds pretty realistic to me. Sadly the game has been modified since this initial version. Now intrepid reporters prowl the streets of a modern day town where a train has derailed and spilled toxic ammonia. “They dig up information by going to the library, government offices or talking to a retired train engineer at the bar.” I use my +4 notebook and fiery pen of truth to record what the guy says!

The team had initially planned to have a crowd of game characters milling about the accident scene, but the game wasn’t amenable to that. A bug in the program meant that any time a player approached a group of people, he was immediately attacked and killed.

This is a bug?