US prisons spark new diet fad

According to the BBC: “An overweight prisoner in the United States is suing the authorities for not feeding him enough after he lost about seven stone (45kg) in jail.” Apparently on the other side of the looking glass stones and KGs are a type of weight. Who knew?

What will really make this diet take off: The prison says it gives prisoners at least 3000 calories a day in food! I predict Leavenworth will soon replace South Beach as the name in weight loss!

Sadly the truth is much more prosaic. Yes our plaintiff, Broderick Lloyd Laswell (awaiting trial for murder) did lose 99 pounds in a mere eight months while eating a reasonable amount of food. That is probably because for Mr. Laswell 3000 calories a day was a marked decrease in what he usually consumed. When he arrived at the jail Mr. L weighed 187kg. To those of you who, like me, this number means nothing, try this: that’s 411.4 pounds.

In his complaint Laswell writes that,

“On several occasions I have started to do some exercising and my vision went blurry and I felt like I was going to pass out … About an hour after each meal my stomach starts to hurt and growl. I feel hungry again. … The only reason we lost weight in here is because we are literally being starved to death.”

Well, he was literally eating himself to death before…

Maybe the headline should read “Weight, Weight, Don’t Tell Me…”

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French law would jail those who “incite thinness”

The French parliament’s lower house adopted a groundbreaking bill Tuesday that would make it illegal for anyone — including fashion magazines, advertisers and Web sites — to publicly incite extreme thinness. … It would give judges the power to imprison and fine offenders up to $47,000 if found guilty of “inciting others to deprive themselves of food” to an “excessive” degree, said [Valery Boyer, a Conservative!!! lawmaker and author of the law].

• Let’s just hope that it makes more sense in the original French. But somehow, I doubt it.
• Who gets to decide what’s excessive? Jenny Craig?
• Can you incite mental illness? The law seems to posit that ads can cause or trigger or exacerbate anorexia. Can they do the same with alcoholism or obsessive-compulsive disorder? Where’s the line here? Anorexia is a very real problem and this is a very real PR move that won’t actually help the issue. “Her bill has mainly brought focus to pro-anorexic Web sites that give advice on how to eat an apple a day — and nothing else.“
• It seems that in France Conservative = Democrat.

China co. uses Chelsea Clinton to brand “weight loss patches”

Chelsea?

The “herbal weight loss patch which its makers said helped former U.S. President Bill Clinton‘s daughter, Chelsea, shed 26.5 lbs. in under a month. … Customers are instructed to stick the patch to the area of the body where they want to lose weight and then just wait for the fat to flow out of them.“

Could we put one on Hillary’s head?

BTW, there’s a great list of this year’s dangerous Chinese imported products at WhoSucks.

Diets can be harmful to your fiscal health

In the UK, a pilot for Virgin Atlantic lost his job because he reeked of booze. Sounds reasonable. He got his job back when it was decided that his low-carb diet made him smell like alcohol. Don’t ask me but here’s the official quote: “Subsequent blood tests later confirmed that the amount of alcohol in his blood was the equivalent to that of a non-drinker.”

Is this going to become the alcoholic’s equivalent of the over-weight claiming that it’s really a thyroid condition?

In China, celebs are learning the pitfalls of accepting money to endorse a product: A Chinese comedian has been sued by a diet-tea drinker who accused him of making false claims in an ad for “Tibetan Secret Fat Elimination Tea.”

Guo Degang claimed he had lost 6.6 lb since drinking the “miraculous Tibetan tea” and his slogan — “No big belly after three boxes of tea” — soon became a popular catch phrase. The plaintiff said she bought three boxes of tea because she was a fan of Guo, but found she lost no weight at all and suffered nausea and vomiting. Sounds like it should be called Tibetan Bulemia Inducing Tea.

In case this first deception wasn’t enough, the plaintiff also said later learned that the tea had nothing to do with Tibet.

In a related story, BankRate.com is running a really good story about “How Much Does Cost To Lose 30 pounds?” In which they run the numbers on how much Jenny Craig, WeightWatchers, NutriMax, et al. will slim your wallet if not your waist line.

• Jenny Craig: Jenny TuneUp, $49, for those who have less than 10 pounds to lose; Jenny OnTrack, $199, a six-month program; and Jenny Rewards, $399 or $358, a 12-month program that rewards dieters efforts and weight loss with discounts on food. That doesn’t include the prepackaged foods which generally cost $11 to $17 per day, or $77 to $119 per week.
• NutriSystem estimated it would take four months. Cost: $1,174.88, including all food, except fresh greens and dairy.
• LA Weight Loss Centers: $685 for 73 weeks, not including the cost of food and something called L A Lite bars.
• Weight Watchers: $214.80 and $299.80, depending on location, or $97.75 online, not including food.
• Zone Diet: $3,599.10 to $4,798.80 — all inclusive.

Or you could eat less and exercise more and get busted when you take the money you would have spent on this nonsense and instead use it to feed the homeless in Orlando. Your call.

Make up your mind! Italy busts the ultra thin while the UK wants to put warning lables on “plus-sized” clothes

Why the EU will never last.

Italy’s government and its fashion chiefs issued a manifesto on Saturday to crack down on the use of ultra-thin teenagers on the catwalk, requiring models to show proof of their good health or be barred from fashion shows.

A leading professor in the U.K. said that obese people should be warned about the health risks of their weight when buying clothes, according to The Daily Mail.

Nestle buys Jenny Craig — now there’s a co-branding opportunity

VEVEY, Switzerland – In a new twist in corporate synergy, Nestle AG, the world's biggest food and drink company, said Monday it will fatten up its weight-loss business by buying Jenny Craig Inc. for $600 million.

Man, even the AP sees the humor in this one. Will we have Jenny Craig candy bars or Nestle diet bars? Or both? 

Will Atkins kill you?

Man, hard to think of a brand/fad that hit its 16th minute of fame as hard as Atkins did. It has fallen so far out of favor that some doctors are saying it might even be fatal.

Study suggests cakes are made of meat

Quoth Reuters: “If you want to keep the weight down, switch to a meat-free diet.” Speaking as a vegetarian: it wasn’t the burgers that added to my buns. FYI, the details: Scientist who studied the eating habits of 22,000 people over five years, including meat eaters and vegetarians, found they all put on a few kilos but meat eaters who changed to a vegetarian or vegan diet gained the least.