Headline of the Day: “Japan’s baseball stadiums urged to drop octopus”

Won’t the octopi get hurt?

TOKYO (AFP) – Animal rights activists on Tuesday urged Japanese baseball stadiums to give up their usual fare of hot dogs and fried octopus balls and go vegetarian to fight global warming. Japan’s baseball commissioners announced as the season opened last week that the national pastime would take action to reduce greenhouse gas emissions, in particular by speeding up games. But People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) said it would be more effective for concession stands to serve exclusively vegetarian fare.

When will PETA start speaking up on behalf of the endangered Tofu?

I would like to commend the Japanese baseball league for making game lengths an environmental issue. I hope MLB follows suit. Anything to speed the games up.

9:29 AM — Manny puts Sox ahead 6-4 in the 10th. They should play more games with a 13 hour time difference. I like watching baseball over breakfast.

And speaking of Japan & cephalapods: Got to watch the Japanese movie Calamari Wrestler last weekend. BRILLIANT! Plot: A dying pro-wrestler is cured by monks. Only drawback: cure turns him into a squid. He resumes his life as a pro-wrestler. Also resumes his relationship with his girlfriend. There are so many hysterical scenes it is hard to pick a favorite but I especially loved the one where the happy couple are skipping down the street hand-in-tentacle. It has special effects on a par with early Dr. Who and a truly wonderful campy humor. The Times quote on the box sums it up perfectly: “A cross between The Muppets and Godzilla.” Which is also a great idea for the next Muppets movie.

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Bigfoot may join endangered species list — Yeti, Loch Ness Monster both say, “Not my problem”

Canadian MP Mike Lake who has called for Bigfoot to be protected under Canada’s species at risk act, alongside Whooping Cranes, Blue Whales, and Red Mulberry trees.

Before you start scoffing remember — if we’d acted sooner we’d still have unicorns, dragons and the Midgard Serpent. Personally, I blame global warming.

Press release over-reach of the day

With all the bad news about contaminated pet food, there’s actually some good news in the pet industry! Not only is going environmentally green a hot topic in real estate right now, but the 38-BILLION DOLLAR pet industry is also seeing a surge in companies going green too.

I LOVE THIS TRANSITION!!!: “Not only is going environmentally green a hot topic in real estate right now…” Has nothing to do with anything else in the release.

And it gets better…

We have some amazing companies we’d love for you to consider interviewing for a story on the trendsetting topic

Kathy Santos Training Aids
Martha Stewart and House Beautiful Magazine’s top pet expert, Kathy Santos, has just created the solution for stressed dogs everywhere. Santos has just released line of natural, organic, and environmentally safe products which prevent behavioral problems. Relieve De Stress helps pets deal with anxiety related (but not limited) to: traveling, separation, thunderstorms, grooming, vet visits, moving & owner’s mood swings. And, Don’t Chew Dare: “helps your dog help himself” with destructive chewing! A few drops in water, by mouth or in food, will ensure that your dog has a “drama free day”.

I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness … or was it animal stress? And what’s the environmental angle on this again?

Poop Pouch
It helps protect the environment and your nose! NEVER CARRY DOG POOP AGAIN! The POOP POUCH for the POOCH attaches directly onto your dog’s standard or retractable leash, and carries the dog poop for you! No more smell, mess or unsightliness with the POOP POUCH!

Yea, at my house we call it a plastic bag.

Eve Envy
Eye Envy safely removes unsightly tear stains from pets. Stains are removed (typically within one week). Product contains NO bleach, peroxide or steroids.

Removes unsightly tear stains from pets? Removes unsightly tear stains from pets? This is a real problem to someone?

GET SERiOUS!
Re-soiling has become the #1 reason pets are placed in shelters today and GET SERiOUS! Stain, Odor & Pheromone Extractor is the ONLY cleaner with the ability to lift out and forever remove the pheromone scent plus the associated stain and odor, so pets aren’t attracted back to the scene of the crime! Cleans in 3 minutes! It’s safe, non-toxic and biodegradable! http://www.getseriousproducts.com

Anyone know what re-soiling is?

Special thanks to the great folks at Orca Communications. Keep up the good work gang!

China says enviro wrecker is double plus good for the environment

Mr. Orwell, call for you on line 2. Oh, Mr. Orwell, pick up please…

Chinese director Chen Kaige, whose movie “The Promise” harmed a pristine Himalayan lakeside during shooting, has been nominated for a “Green Chinese” award for raising environmental awareness. … The annual “Green Chinese” award, co-sponsored by seven government departments and endorsed by the U.N. Environment Programme, selects five to 10 Chinese who have made a “great contribution” to protecting the environment, Xinhua said.

Technorati Tags: China, environment, Orwell, 1984, language, Kaige, Himalaya

I now understand BP’s claim to be a green oil company

Quoth the Wall Street Journal:

Public, Political Pressure May Rise
As Inquiry Looks Into Possibility
Of Manipulation in Gas, Oil Prices

Federal investigators are examining whether BP manipulated crude-oil and unleaded-gasoline markets, signaling a rise in regulatory scrutiny of the British energy giant, said lawyers and traders close to the case.

See here we all thought that by green they meant concern for the environment. That claim was so ludicrous (see Alaskan oil fields) but now it makes sense: Green = $. And it’s refreshingly honest, too.
If these allegations are true it proves that BP has problems on more than just a moral level. How dumb does a gas/oil company have to be to bother with manipulating markets in THIS economy? Mr. Gild, meet Mr. Lilly. Even by my lax standards this falls under “excessive profit taking.”