WikiLeaks is at the cutting edge of irony

From Glenn Greenwald’s piece in Salon:

WikiLeaks suggested the “other source” was Daniel Domscheit-Berg, a former WikiLeaks associate who WikiLeaks claims took, without authorization, many WikiLeaks files when he left.

I am a fan of what WikiLeaks does but not so much of Julian Assange.

I’m sure he’s very upset about this.

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Is this the worst ad placement ever?

hanger

Probably not, but it’s still impressive.

It’s a winner!

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FDA announces recall of “Toxic Waste® brand Nuclear Sludge® Chew Bars”

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NOMINITAVE DETERMINISM IN ACTION!

There’s really nothing you could possibly add to that headline but if you want to read the FDA announcement go here.

IRONY OVERLOAD ALERT: Nigeria charges Dick Cheney in bribery case

Nigeria will file charges against former U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney and officials from five foreign companies including Halliburton Co. over a $180 million bribery scandal, a prosecutor at the anti-graft agency said.

NIGERIA is upset over financial fraud? Mr. Pot meet Mr. Kettle. HALLIBURTON is involved in bribery? I’m shocked. Just shocked.

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Ronald McDonald rings opening bell on Wall St., then threatens to cut insurance for 30K workers

These two items appeared in rapid succession in my Twitter feed:

screen-shot-2010-03-17-at-12403-pm2 9:26 AM — @CNNLive ‘Ronald McDonald’ rings Wall Street opening bell. Live: http://on.cnn.com/cnndcl2

9:29 AM — @WSJ McDonald’s says it may drop health insurance for nearly 30,000 workers unless a new requirement is waived http://on.wsj.com/acZl03

 

In case you are wondering, you can follow me on Twitter at CurseYouKhan.

 

Image is from Logorama, which won the Oscar last year for best short animation.

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US has record number of millionaires, poor people, irony

Two news stories from the same day:

Millionaire Population Soars — Again

According to a new survey from Phoenix Marketing International’s Affluent Market Practice, the number of American households with investible assets of $1 million or more rose 8% in the 12 months ended in June. The survey says there now are 5.55 million U.S. households with investible assets of $1 million or more.

USA’s poverty rate reaches highest level in 51 years

A total of 43.6 million people lived in poverty last year, up from 39.8 million in 2008 — the third consecutive annual increase. Extended unemployment benefits lifted 3.3 million people out of poverty, compared with 900,000 in 2008.

The Penguins of Irony’s favorite moment in the effort to save journalism from its future

Here are two of the 10 projects that came out of the “Journalism That Matters” conference at the University of Washington in January.

  • Abundant Journalism: Led by Fancher, this group eventually wants to link journalism projects and initiatives with potential donors.
  • Microfinance: The initiative would provide business and micro-finance training for journalists who want to launch new media ventures.

Whether all 10 initiatives that came out of the JTM Pacific Northwest conference can score the necessary funding to survive remains uncertain. While some have obtained initial grants, others remain unfunded. [Former Seattle Times Executive Editor Mike] Fancher acknowledged that each will face heavy competition for financing.”

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Be afraid: Rep. starts congressional ‘Media Fairness Caucus’

From my blog at EmediaVitals:

Congressman Lamar Smith (R-Idiocy) believes the press is biased and doesn’t represent the values of most Americans. Reasonable people could disagree on this but it’s certainly not an unusual or insane point of view. What is insane is Smith’s solution. The Media Fairness Circus, er, Caucus: “will encourage fairness and balance in reporting, while calling attention to biased coverage in a fair and reasonable way. By bringing attention to media bias and promoting an open dialogue between members of the media and elected officials, we plan to remind the media of their profound obligation to provide the American people with the facts, and not tell them what to think.

Read the rest here at EmediaVitals.

penguin-sealIt is worth noting that this level of stupidity isn’t limited to the legislative branch. Today, President Obama signed a bill promoting free press around the world. The bill was named after slain journalist Daniel Pearl. Here’s the kicker: Press access to the signing was restricted.

The ceremony on Monday raised some eyebrows as well because the White House restricted media access as the president signed a free press bill. The event was open only to a pool of reporters and photographers who report back to their colleagues. It also came at a time when Mr. Obama’s administration is seeking to force a New York Times reporter, James Risen, to testify about his sources for a book in which he reported on a secret effort to undermine Iran’s nuclear program.

 

CRY HAVOC, AND LOOSE THE PENGUINS OF IRONY!!!

Montblanc regrets “honoring” Gandhi with $24K fountain pen

Either Montblanc’s execs have a brilliant sense of irony or they’re complete idiots, you decide.

image_thumb15 Whichever is the case, they have “unconditionally apologized” to an Indian court about it – at least until the court rules on whether the company can continue to sell the pen. The pen was marketed as a way of honoring 140th birthday of the brilliant spokesman for the poor.

What, you may ask, justifies the $24,000 cost of this ink delivery system?

The gold and silver limited edition pen includes an engraving of Gandhi and comes with an eight-meter golden thread that can be wound around the pen, representing the spindle and cotton Gandhi used to weave simple cloth.

Montblanc made only 241 of the handmade pens, one for each mile Gandhi walked in his famous march against salt taxes in 1930. And you thought they were insensitive!

It should be noted that the company did think of the needs of the less affluent consumer when producing this pen. They are also offering ballpoint and rollerball versions for a mere $3000 per.

Fight at health-care forum leaves anti-reform protester with big medical bills

Kenneth Gladney, 38, of St. Louis, claims he was injured when union members attacked the politically conservative Gladney last Friday. The union denies says this and says Gladney started it. Both sides are preparing the traditional “I’m made of rubber, your made of glue defense.” Whoever’s fault it was, the melee ended in six arrests. It was one of several at meetings around the country held to discuss ideas to reform the nation’s costly health care system.

Gladney is accepting donations toward his medical expenses. Gladney told reporters he was laid off recently and has no health insurance.”

Sadly the article doesn’t mention if anyone asked Gladney “Oh, irony where is thy sting?”

 

Cry Havoc and release the Penguins.

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Alcohol-enforcement official faces career-ending irony

A member of the city commission responsible for enforcing liquor laws was arrested early Thursday on suspicion of driving under the influence of alcohol. Danny Kim, 33, was arrested shortly after 2 a.m. Thursday at Kilauea and Makapu’u avenues near Kapi’olani Community College. Kim, one of five members of the Honolulu Liquor Commission, was booked and released on $500 bail about two hours after his arrest.

Penguins Employee of the month

Remarks by the President at Ceremonial Groundbreaking of United States Institute of Peace

Cry Havoc, and Loose the Penguins of Irony!

Mr. Secretary, thank you for your kind introduction, and thank you for inviting me to join you to break ground for the United States Institute of Peace’s new home.  I’m really pleased to be here.  I appreciate what you do to resolve conflict and support new democracies and to build peace by promoting effective diplomacy.

‘Cuz I sure as hell am not going to.

HMO’s mascot is a 6-foot-11 walking urine vial

His name is Petey P. Cup and he is the mascot for HealthPartners of Bloomington, MN.

Petey P. Cup even has a Facebook profile, which says he enjoys watching “Grey’s Anatomy,” listening to Coldplay and assisting with urinalysis, drug testing and pregnancy tests. Just six friends so far, though. HealthPartners hopes he’ll have more soon. The Bloomington health care nonprofit wants the campaign to persuade 40 percent of its clinic patients to sign up for a new website service that will allow them to schedule appointments, access medical records and consult with doctors from their computer.

The Minnesota Post story says: “The campaign appears aimed at a younger demographic that understands irony, YouTube and social networking.”

If the younger demographic understands irony, they will understand this is not it. This is just odd.

Irony would be having the mascot be a CPA.

Why Al Gore shouldn’t have won the Nobel Peace Prize

First my bona fides:

  1. I started covering global warming in the early 1990s. I have no doubts about it and have read more on the topic than your average bear (especially the polar bears who don’t read that much anymore because they’re having to look for new homes because the polar ice cap is melting, fortunately for them this is happening just as the US real estate market is tanking … but I digress).
  2. You really, really don’t want to know how much military history I’ve read. It’s a lot. I remember my cell phone number because it’s close to the year of the battle of Hastings. I know when the first battle that we have records from both sides was. (1300 BC. Hittites vs. Egyptians. The home team Hittites, under coach Muwatallis, won the contest at Kadesh but didn’t cover the spread. In case you were wondering, Muwatallis is also known to history as Mutwatallis and Mutwatalli II. His friends all called him Fred because when they tried to call him Mut he had them beheaded.) So yeah, you don’t want to go there with me.
  3. Ever since he got out of politics I’ve been a big Al Gore fan. Prior to losing the 2000 election I never would have suspected he could be interesting AND funny. Love him on Futurama and Saturday Night Live. No I have never seen “Inconvenient Truth.” As the great Tim McIntyre puts it: I don’t need to study for a test I’ve already passed.
  4. So…

Al Gore won the Nobel PEACE Prize? Yeah, I know environmental problems are and will cause all sorts of conflicts. So what? They always have. Dear Nobel Committee (and this is as close to it as I will ever get) what part of the phrase “peace prize” don’t you understand?

doctors without borders logoThe Peace Prize goes to great groups like Doctors Without Borders and The Red Cross. It goes to people who actually stopped fighting or helped people deal with the aftermath of war. It also went to Henry Kissinger. That Peace Prize is most notable because Tom Lehrer cited it as proof that irony was indeed dead.

Penguins Employee of the monthThis is a stretch. If you want to give a prize for generally helping the planet than give one of those. Mr. Gore would certainly deserve that one. But lets give the Peace Prize to something having to do with armed conflict. Is that asking too much? So that’s why I am naming the Nobel Committee the Nat’l. Assoc. of Penguins of Irony Employee of the Month. I look forward to their acceptance speech.

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