What if Teva made stiletto pumps? Now remove the part about “What if.”

tevastiletto-490x490When I came across this my jaw dropped so far and so fast it made me wish my office had carpeting. Mad, mad props to TheGloss.com for finding this and for writing “they come in two colors – “Natural” and “Worlds Unite” (black and white, natch). Is it a good idea or bad idea to wear them with socks? And why do they cost $330?”

The perfect thing to wear to a post-apocalypse formal affair. Like when the world has run out of oil and and the bad guys careen around the highways anyway with guns and high fashion models and the only person you can rely on is that nameless stranger who will someday grow up to be an anti-Semitic psychopath.

“Cows point north” not the oddest science story of the week

The winner is: Growing new ear hairs that can boost hearing

“Scientists have used gene therapy on mouse embryos to grow hair cells with the potential to reduce hearing loss in adult animals”

This is breakthrough news for those of us with hairy ears and lousy hearing. Now I’ll know when people say my unkempt ears look disgusting!

However the potential development of a bovine GPS is certainly my nominee for “Study Guaranteed to Win an Ig Nobel Prize.”

Somehow, cattle seem to know how to find north and south, say researchers who studied satellite photos of thousands of cows around the world. Most cattle that were grazing or resting tended to align their bodies in a north-south direction, a team of German and Czech researchers reports in Tuesday’s issue of Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. And the finding held true regardless of what continent the cattle were on, according to the study led by Hynek Burda and Sabine Begall of the faculty of biology at the University of Duisburg-Essen in Germany.

Clearly we need to send three cattle into space and see if two of them still point north.

What with the recent advances in cattle miniaturization (NOT MAKING THIS UP), it seems quite possible that the big threat to TomTom could go Moo Moo.

Why do I think the people behind the cow study came up with the idea after a day of smoking pot and reading Gary Larson?

Birth Control Breath Mints

Y’know, sometimes you think they can’t actually make reality any weirder and this comes along.

“A pharmaceutical company, Warner Chilcott, announced today the availability of a new chewable birth control pill with a refreshing spearmint flavor.”

Because they can, that’s why.