Joe Barton wasn’t only GOP-er apologizing to BP

Wow. The Republicans sure seem determined to give the mid-term elections back to the Democrats.

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Obama carried all the “really” red states

My latest from BlownMortgage (with charts and facts and everything!):

Popular opinion has it that Barack Obama won because he took some red states away from John McCain. Nonsense. Obama won all the red states. And McCain won all the black states. But this has nothing to do with that stupid red state/blue state dichotomy. This is about the much more tangible difference between red (ink) states vs. black (ink) states.

As this chart from the Wall Street Journal shows, Obama carried 18 of the 20 states where housing prices have dipped into the red – according to the Office of Federal Housing Enterprise Oversight house price index for the second quarter. Those two that went for McCain? Arizona and Alaska – which makes their anomalous standing understandable.

How big a deal was yesterday?

I do not know a greater pessimist than my father, CollateralDamage Sr. A life in journalism earns you that. During that life he covered civil rights movement in the South. Yesterday he told me about being in a housing project in Selma, Alabama, on the night that President Johnson essentially told Congress that it had to pass the Voting Rights Act. TVs were a much rarer thing then and people gathered in one apartment to watch Johnson’s speech on a small black-and-white. He told me how people started to cry on hearing that their government was finally going to be on their side. And then he said with more than a little wonder, “That wasn’t that long ago.”

BTW, let me also mention Mother CollateralDamage. She will tell you that she was not in fact at the march in Selma in 1965. That is because her bus connections were lousy and she got there late. Personally I give her a mulligan on that one.

Who’s winning the World of Warcraft vote?

While McCain’s ad hominem attack on Dungeons & Dragons earlier this year would seem to put him at a distinct disadvantage, the poll results are surprising. And incredibly funny.

Thanks to Mike Elgan who writes the wonderful blog Raw Feed for this one!

It’s all over: Ralph Stanley endorses Obama

Chances are you don’t know who Ralph Stanley is. That’s because you’re an effete Eastern liberal who wouldn’t know the real thing if it whacked you upside the head with a banjo. Well, when the real thing does whack you upside the head with a banjo, if you are blessed that banjo will be held by Ralph Stanley.

Ralph Stanley is it. He is THE man of bluegrass and real country music.

Although he needs no introduction, we’ll go ahead and give him one anyway. Ralph was born in Dickenson County, Virginia, where he still resides when he’s not on the road. After 55 years in the business, he’s still the best banjo picker and tenor singer in bluegrass music. As a recording artist, he has performed on more than 170 albums, tapes, and CDs. He’s also written many songs himself and with his brother, the late Carter Stanley.

The one place you liberal punks might have seen him is in O Brother Where Art Thou? He sings O Death and if that isn’t the voice of fate, it’s as close as I want to get.

Well, Dr. Stanley (seen below with an unnamed fan) has endorsed Obama.

One of these people is a genius.

One of these people is a genius.

Not just endorsed but cut a radio ad: “Howdy, friends. This is Ralph Stanley, and I think I know a little something about the families around here. … Barack’ll cut taxes for everyday folks — not big business — so you’ll have a little more money in your pocket at the end of the year … I also know Barack is a good man. A father and devoted husband, he values personal responsibility and family first.” (click on link to hear entire ad)

Among your true Rednecks (a phrase used here with admiration), this is a huge endorsement. This will have ripples as people who revere Dr. Stanley — many of whom are as red state as you can possibly be — will give Obama some extra thought. These people are key influencers. (Not counting effete Easterners like myself.)

This ad may only get aired in Virginia, but it will get heard around the nation.

Company introduces “Sarah-Cuda” hunting bow

What’s pink, cuddly and can bring down a moose or at least a Biden? The GOP hopes it’s Sarah Palin, they might want to invest in Lakota Industries adorable new hunting bow. While the pink camo is certainly fitting  … you really have to hope anything your hunting is color blind. Or maybe it will distract Dick Cheney if you ever have to go hunting with the current VP.

Other potential candidate/product tie ins:

  • The Joe Biden Leaf Blower — How much hot air do you need?
  • The John McCain Pistol Holster — Allows you to shoot from the hip and automatically hit your own foot.
  • Barack Obama Holy Water — Everybody keeps telling me he can perform miracles.
Are Bidens in season?

Are Bidens in season?

Nice move: The company will donate 10 percent of Sarah-Cuda proceeds to the National Association for Down Syndrome.

Biden reaches past historical accuracy for a greater truthiness

Over at Reason, someone unearthed this gem from Joe Biden’s sit down with Katie Couric: “When the stock market crashed, Franklin Roosevelt got on the television and didn’t just talk about the princes of greed. He said, ‘look, here’s what happened.'”

As has been pointed out at the blog:

  • Roosevelt wasn’t president when the market crashed.
  • Television was just an experiment. If FDR had gotten on TV and said this he would have been talking to an audience in the mid- to high-single digits.

On the plus side for the Obama campaign: This is an original idiocy and does not seem to have been plagiarized from anyone else.

What do Democrats and Cubs fans have in common?

…they assume that something will go wrong until proven otherwise. Great line by Nate Silver over at fivethirtyeight.com.

Despite its unabashed (and clearly announced) pro-Democratic stance, this site is my source of information about political polling. They survey all the polls, weight them for a number of factors and come up with results that to my eyes are the best out there.

Expert & McCain adviser says Palin couldn’t run Hewlett-Packard

When it comes to not being able to run HP it’s hard to get a more reliable source than former CEO Carly Fiorina.

“Do you think [Palin] has the experience to run a major company, like Hewlett Packard?” Fiorina was asked on a St. Louis radio show.

“No, I don’t,” Fiorina said without further explanation.

“I would just remind you that it is Barack Obama who is running for president,” Fiorina said. “Sarah Palin has more experience than Barack Obama has.”

Under Fiorina’s tenure at HP, the company’s stock went from 45.36 to 20.14.

Forecast: Mud with more mud followed by a storm of masculine bovine feces

I have no idea where he got it, but CollateralDamage Sr. sent along the following. No matter where you stand politically this seems to me to just be good comedy.

Elsewhere:

Hard to believe that truthiness — the quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true –was the 2005 Word of the Year.  Can you have a repeat winner?

OK and for the record … I was right when I said Palin was a brilliant pick for McCain. I just didn’t know how right I was. And for the record, I also predicted that Obama would win by a lot. Hmmmm …

The real question about Sarah Palin

I do not care about her kids. Anyone asking how she couldn’t be home with the new born and/or oldest daughter is a sexist idiot. I hope the experience with her eldest makes Gov. Palin give a long rethink on the topic of abstinence only education, but that is an issue that is for her and her heart and not germaine to what it is she will be asked to do.

I am fascinated by the fact that she is the only candidate who will get a raise if she wins. The governor of Alaska currently earns $83,280. The veep gets $208,100.

The chief reason I think she shouldn’t be a heartbeat away from becoming president has nothing to do with her gender. it is that she is a creationist. If she herself doesn’t believe in creationism she has said that it should be taught in schools. If you are going to teach creationism as science — as opposed to teaching the Bible as literature which I am all in favor of — then you must also teach the Cthulhu Mythos and Flying Spaghetti Monster as science.

Still there is one essential question that I am positive was overlooked in the vetting process: Has the governor or any one in her family ever played Dungeons & Dragons?

C’mon you intrepid journalists! This one has Pulitzer all over it!

The tea leaves continue to suggest that things are not going well for Sen. McCain. David Frum, NPR’s token conservative, said that the Palin pick came about because McCain had seen some troubling internal poll numbers that said he had to make a big risk if he wants to win.

Also Political Wire says

My prediction: This is not going to be close in the final count.

Self-serving attempt at ballot box stuffing

OK, I’ll admit that I like getting pointless awards and such as much if not more than the next person. The voting for blogger’s choice awards is open and I’m up in the humor, business & marketing categories.

My site was nominated for Best Business Blog! My site was nominated for Best Humor Blog! My site was nominated for Best Marketing Blog!

The truth is I will win none of them and shouldn’t given the categories. (I got an honorable mention in marketing when the blog started out as part of CMO magazine). If there was an award for best humor business & marketing blog, I still wouldn’t win but I’d have a shot. That said, I will now beg for your vote in one or all three of the categories above. Click on one of the pictures and it will take you to the site and yeah you have to register to vote so it’s a pain and I’m sorry. And yeah, I know these awards are even less meaningful than a people’s choice award.

All that said, allow me to list my campaign promises in an attempt to win you over:

  • I will or will not (depending on your preference) take a stand on a controversial subject
  • I won’t increase taxes.
  • I won’t raise your cholesterol.
  • I won’t wage a negative campaign — despite using won’t a lot.
  • I will not coddle terrorists.
  • I will not infringe on your civil liberties.
  • I will support your right to bear arms as long you are not an idiot.
  • I will provide universal health care for my dog and office manager Roxxy.
  • I will eat my vegetables.
  • I will offer you a cup of coffee (or tea).
  • I will say thank you and I will say excuse me after I burp.
  • I will say no to drugs — except a few like FlowMax that you really wish I wouldn’t mention.
  • I will put down the toilet seat.
  • I will think a lot about cleaning up my office.
  • I will not start any wars.
  • I will go to Disney World (although not any time real soon).
  • I will brush and floss regularly.
  • I will take time to smell the roses even though they aren’t my favorite flower.
  • I will cackle with glee when the Yankees any team from New York loses. (Heather — is this better?)
  • I will listen to both country and western musics.
  • I will try to have the longest categories list of any blog anywhere.
  • I will not run GM into the ground.
  • I will cry havoc and loose the penguins of irony.

I’d vote for a Yellow dog no matter the party

FAIRHOPE, Ala. – One of the candidates in the race to become Fairhope’s next mayor is considerably more hairy than the rest. He also has twice as many legs and a constantly wagging tail. Wille Bean Roscoe P. Coltrane is a 7-year-old yellow Labrador retriever whose owner has taken a satirical poke at politics by launching the pooch into the race.

If elected Willie Bean will not be the nation’s first canine mayor, nor its first Labrador one.

In 2004, Rabbit Hash, Ky., elected Junior Cochran, a black Lab, as mayor. It was the second canine elected to lead the small Northern Kentucky town, according to the town’s Web site. The first was a mutt named Goofy Borneman, according to Laurie Lamblin, a resident and employee of the town’s historic general store.

A moment of silence is in order.

Mayor Cochran (“Mayor Junior” to his many friends) died two months ago.

During his time in office the mayor served as mascot for the Northern Kentucky Women’s Crisis Center’s pet protection program, helped raise money at benefits by manning kissing booths, was the subject of a 2006 TV special on Animal Planet, and in 2004 he helped dedicate an Underground Railroad Memorial in the town. I’ve known mayors who’ve done far less.

All water dishes will remain half-filled during the official period of mourning.

BTW, in 1986 Lajitas, Texas, elected Clay Henry, a beer-drinking goat, as mayor. Boston also had a beer drinking goat as mayor at the time, his name was Ray Flynn. Wait. He wasn’t a goat.

Excuse me, I do believe I may be moving to Rabbit Hash.

PS: Headline explained here.

Snopes took my KKK endorsement of Obama away

Apparently there is an email going around which contains the following “news” story:

White supremacist group the Ku Kux Klan has endorsed Barack Obama to be the next president of the United States. Speaking from his Kentucky office in Dawson Springs, the Imperial Wizard exclaimed that anything or anyone is better than having that “crazy ass bitch” as President.

Sadly Snopes debunks what would have been one of most wonderful stories ever. And, I think, a nice endorsement of Hillary.

Gabba Gabba Hey!

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