With Hillary out, what now?

The AP is reporting something a lot of people weren’t sure would come to pass:

WASHINGTON – Hillary Rodham Clinton will concede Tuesday night that Barack Obama has the delegates to secure the Democratic nomination, campaign officials said, effectively ending her bid to be the nation’s first female president.

I find it amazing that both parties managed to pick the one candidate who could actually make a race of it. That’s good news for the GOP and bad news for the Democrats.

The economy is in the tank, we’re in a war no one (any longer) wants to be in and the current president is about as popular as a nudist at an Amish church dinner. Obama should be 20 points up right now.

But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

There’s the melanin issue, there’s the youth issue, there’s the class issues, there’s the war hero issue, there’s the bitterness issue. Thus John McCain — who I think rode with Teddy Roosevelt and the Rough Riders in Cuba — has an arguable chance to be the oldest president since Ronald Reagan’s brain.

Let me be clear about one thing: I have voted in every election since Reagan/Carter and I think this is the best choice I’ve ever been offered. I have issues with both Obama and McCain and I like both of them as well. I have never been able to say that before in a presidential election. One of the two men I agree with less than the other but even the one I don’t agree with I wouldn’t be totally miserable to have in office. I think it is an excellent sign that both candidates have not only been guests on Wait, Wait … Don’t Tell Me but both have been really, really funny. Huzzah for humor!

Bumper sticker courtesy of the most excellent Agatha & Louise in Portland, ME.

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Fully loaded car comes complete with pistol

Mark Mulder, owner of Max Motors in Butler, Missouri, reports that sales have soared since launching a promotion this week that promises buyers a free handgun or a $250 gas card with every purchase.

“This thing has taken off. Sales have quadrupled,” said Muller. The store sells both used and new vehicles including General Motors and Ford products. Every buyer so far “except one guy from Canada* and one old guy” has elected to take the gun, Muller said. Muller recommends his customers select a Kel-Tec .380 pistol. “It’s a nice little handgun that fits in your pocket.”

“We did it because of Barack Obama. He said all those people in the Midwest, you’ve got to have compassion for them because they’re clinging to their guns and their Bibles. I found that quite offensive. … We all go to church on Sunday and we all carry guns,” said Muller. “I’ve got a gun in my pocket right now. I have a rifle in my truck. We’ve got to shoot the coyotes out here, they’re attacking our cows, our chickens. We’re not clinging to nothing. We’re just damn glad to live in a free country where you can have a gun if you want. This is the way it ought to be.”

See, the Democrats are already helping the economy.

*Damn Canadians.

Heather points out the shoes to wear while driving your car from Max’s. They were designed by Karl Lagerfeld and will be put out by Chanel.

Via Shoeblogs

If you like to drink and drive — that is get loaded while driving fully loaded — here’s the drink for you:

More examples of weaponized alcohol containers can be found here.

Bush gave up golf for families of Iraq war dead

“I don’t want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the Commander-in-Chief playing golf,” Bush said. “I feel I owe it to the families to be as — to be in solidarity as best as I can with them. And I think playing golf during a war just sends the wrong signal.”

My head hurts from this quote.

Dear George, you want to show solidarity with these families? How about you visit each and every one of them. Maybe explain why neither you nor your children have served in this or any other war. How about adequate funding and administration for the Veterans Administration? How about not being an idiot? How about not starting wars on fictitious grounds?

Good Lord.

McCain? Hillary? Obama?

I’ll take any of them over this fool.

Not Huckabee, though. I can’t live through another administration that views facts as malleable.

Newspaper runs Borowitz satire as news story

My former employers at the Boston Herald somehow managed to read Andy Borowitz’s story about Dick Cheney challenging La Hillary to a shooting contest as a real story. Here’s the top of what Borowitz originally wrote:

Cheney Challenges Hillary to Hunting Contest
‘Meet Me in the Woods,’ Says Veep

One day after Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton professed an abiding affection for guns and hunting, her love of firearms came under attack from another sometime hunter in Washington.

Appearing on NBC’s “Meet the Press,” Vice President Dick Cheney said that a hunting contest between him and the New York senator was “the only way” to determine whether Sen. Clinton’s tales of her gun prowess were for real.

The only thing that’s better than that is the correction the paper ran:

An article in today’s Herald regarding comments purportedly made by Vice President Dick Cheney was inaccurate and should have noted that it was based on a blogger’s satire and was not provided by the Associated Press.

The story about the non-story was broken by Boston Daily, the blog of another one of my sometime employers, Boston Magazine. (No matter what you might otherwise have been told, Boston is in fact a small town.)

We were bamboozled,” Herald publisher Kevin Convey told Boston Daily. He explained that the item got picked up as straight news in Google, and was folded into unrelated wire reports from the AP, and appeared online and in the print edition.

“We failed to double-check the item against the Meet the Press website, which we should have done. We have changed our policies a bit to make sure this doesn’t happen again,” Convey added.

My sympathies, Kev, because you have to explain someone a mistake made by someone else but let’s make it clear: you weren’t bamboozled. That suggests malicious intent on the part of someone else. This one was self-inflicted.

BTW, Borowitz rightly makes a big deal of the fact that he is “Winner Of The First-Ever National Press Club Award For Humor” but I think this is an even better honor

Hillary likens herself to “Rocky” — she’s a sequel you have no interest in seeing?

Yep, she set herself up for another one. She really needs to get a comedian on staff to help her avoid these things.

Let me tell you something, when it comes to finishing a fight, Rocky and I have a lot in common. I never quit. I never give up.” No matter how tired the audience gets…

Snopes took my KKK endorsement of Obama away

Apparently there is an email going around which contains the following “news” story:

White supremacist group the Ku Kux Klan has endorsed Barack Obama to be the next president of the United States. Speaking from his Kentucky office in Dawson Springs, the Imperial Wizard exclaimed that anything or anyone is better than having that “crazy ass bitch” as President.

Sadly Snopes debunks what would have been one of most wonderful stories ever. And, I think, a nice endorsement of Hillary.

Gabba Gabba Hey!

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Taking a break…

I am fleeing the cold weather and the blogosphere for a week, so you’ll have to get your snarky commentary elsewhere for a while.

MauiA few thoughts for the road:

  1. Is Hillary copying the Giuliani playbook? Hil’s attitude of we’ll win one of these days seems very reminiscent of Rudy’s.
  2. Greenspan says we’re on the edge of a recession. Sorry Alan but we passed that a while ago. An attitude only a rich man could have.
  3. Condi & Zinni for Veeps? Collateral Damage Sr. says McCain will opt for the best piano player on either side while Obama picks the General to strengthen his flank. Both picks make sense which is why I doubt they will come to pass.
  4. Anybody can have a bad century: Pitchers and catchers reported to spring training meaning this is officially the centennial season of Cub ineptitude. (CD Sr. also said the Cubs have a chance this year. Whaddya expect from a Senators fan?)

Image via TheRevC.com

Presidential Idol in New Hampshire: An explanation

Here’s my take on what happened.

  1. Most of the press dislikes Hillary so much that they were overjoyed to jump on the Obama-mania bandwagon. This isn’t some sort of vast-MSM conspiracy, it’s just that Hillary and the media have always taken each other’s actions personally. My sympathies lie with the MSM and not Hillary in that particular debate. However, that doesn’t change the fact that pretty much everyone called it wrong.
  2. Mitt Romney has now lost in a state where no one knew him and in one where everybody knew him. He now hopes to win in a state where everyone over the age of 45 once knew his father. Somewhere the lone Romney fanatic not on Mitt’s payroll is sad. The rest of us can rejoice. I wonder how much the dislike of Mitt got independents to vote against him in the GOP primary and not vote for someone on the Democratic side?
  3. Weirdest moment of the zeitgeist: Listening to interview after interview with people saying that they were trying to decide between Obama and McCain. Now, I like both of those guys. I’d be happy with either one in the White House. That said — they have nothing in common policy wise. The differences between them are about as subtle as the difference between pasta and LSD.