When being annoying in public is outlawed, only outlaws will publicly annoy us (I wish)

… or maybe journalists, marketers, pollsters, pols and lawyers will become outlaws

BRIGHTON, Mich. –  The Brighton City Council on Thursday approved an ordinance allowing police in the Livingston County community to ticket and fine anyone who is annoying in public “by word of mouth, sign or motions.”

Given that my good friend and proud new papa Campbell lives in Brighton, MI, I think I know the cause of this ordinance.

Special tip of a collaterally damaged hat to Tim Rueb for this one!

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Headline of the day: “Man Gets Probation in Pickle Assault”

“The fact that it’s silly doesn’t mean that it’s not serious.”– Berrien, MI, Trial Court Judge Scott Schofield sentencing Bobby Bolen to time served and 1 year of probation for assaulting two people.

The assault happened after Bolen helped himself to some pickles in an Jody Lee’s refrigerator. According to police, Lee then ” told Bolen he couldn’t afford to feed everyone and not to eat his pickles.”

Later, Bolen barged back into the house and got into an argument with Lee. Lee told police Bolen slammed him down on the couch and threw two large pickles at him and said, “Here’s your damn pickles.”

Another person at the scene was also assaulted. Defense attorney Robert Lutz said alcohol appeared to be at the root of Bolen’s problems.

Personally, I blame the pickles.

Someone get the brand of that pickle. “Pickles worth fighting over.” Now that’s a slogan.