Facebook causes crimes, cops & cancer

It’s Facebook’s world — we only live in it.

I am guilty as charged, see here for proof.

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Baltimore Police ad campaign spurs laughs and gratitude

It’s not just The Wire or Homicide in Baltimore it seems.

Partial transcript … more can be found here.

Sidewalk Scene

Female Officer: Hey, how would you like to be a cop for a day?

Citizen: Gee, um…

Male Officer: Aww, come on…

Citizen: Sounds like fun.

Backyard Scene

[Dog barking, while the citizen backs away.]

Female Officer: Whoa, whoa, whoa, where are you going?

Male Officer: Where are you going there?

Alley Scene

[The three are on foot, chasing a suspect. While the citizen catches his breath, the female officer approaches with the apprehended suspect.]

Female Officer: Come on, we have some paperwork to do…

Citizen: [Panting] Right with you…

Tip of the combat helmet to recently promoted SFC Big Brother Collateral Damage for the link!

Headline of the day: “Man Gets Probation in Pickle Assault”

“The fact that it’s silly doesn’t mean that it’s not serious.”– Berrien, MI, Trial Court Judge Scott Schofield sentencing Bobby Bolen to time served and 1 year of probation for assaulting two people.

The assault happened after Bolen helped himself to some pickles in an Jody Lee’s refrigerator. According to police, Lee then ” told Bolen he couldn’t afford to feed everyone and not to eat his pickles.”

Later, Bolen barged back into the house and got into an argument with Lee. Lee told police Bolen slammed him down on the couch and threw two large pickles at him and said, “Here’s your damn pickles.”

Another person at the scene was also assaulted. Defense attorney Robert Lutz said alcohol appeared to be at the root of Bolen’s problems.

Personally, I blame the pickles.

Someone get the brand of that pickle. “Pickles worth fighting over.” Now that’s a slogan.

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