Let’s not do this Time Warp again

They’re going to do a remake of Rocky Horror Picture Show. What a horrible idea — although it is in keeping with the Return to the 1970s thing that has seized the zeitgeist — inflation, gas you can’t afford to buy, ABBA, to name just a few of the current phenoms.

It is impossible to think that anyone will be able to fill Tim Curry’s garters, let alone have a voice nearly as fabulous. I mean how do you top having Susan Sarandon AND Meatloaf in your movie??? Please.

The original was THE initial coming-out event for many of my friends (“Oh, mom, I’m just dressing up like the guy in the movie … why are you reading so much into this?”). It is also beloved by three VIPs in my life: Mrs. CollateralDamage, Mother CollateralDamage, and my late great wrestling coach, Jack Peckett.

The man had seen Rocky Horror Picture Show more times than anyone I had ever met. Why? He just loved it. One time as we pulled up at a tri-meet (wrestling being what it is you can have several teams wrestle at once) vs. the US Merchant Marine Academy and some other school we had no chance against, he looked up at the school and back at his van full of wrestlers and asked without a trace of irony: “Whatever happened to Fay Wray?” He had a knack for always knowing the right thing to say.

Personally, I prefer the soundtrack to the actual movie but that’s just me.

How much will this movie suck? Oh, beyond all measure.