Report says Steve Jobs is behind rise in crime rate

Researchers at The Urban Institute, a Washington think tank, say that iPods are the reason U.S. violent crime rose in 2005 and 2006.

A key point in the Urban Institute’s argument is that robberies _ the taking of something by force or the threat of it _ had seen dramatic reductions since the 1990s, but jumped in 2005 and 2006. FBI statistics show the robbery rate went from 137 per 100,000 people in 2004 to 141 per 100,000 in 2005 and 149 in 2006. That helped boost the overall rate of violent crime in those years, even as rape rates fell and aggravated assault was generally flat. During those years, iPods were going mainstream. In late 2004, Apple had sold about 5 million iPods. By the end of 2005 that had ballooned to 42 million, and in 2006 the number neared 90 million I’m so glad the reporter explained what a robbery is. I was starting to get confused.

The alleged ipso facto is that the iPod and other expensive electronic gewgaws are highly desired, easy to steal and easy to re-sell. The Institute — certainly not fishing for some free PR — has dubbed this phenomenon “The iCrime Wave.”

Thankfully the reporter pokes a few holes in this theory:

1. While iPod thefts on subways and other crowded urban settings provide the best anecdotal evidence, the 2005-06 crime increases were highest in small and midsized cities _ places with less-dense pedestrian traffic, let alone teeming subways.
2. Some stolen iPods might fall into the category of larceny _ a theft without force, such as when something is filched from a backpack _ and larcenies dropped in ’05 and ’06.

Marketing tip to the Urban Institute — naming anything the iSomething is beyond over.

Advertisement

Interweb now blamed for people’s inability to tell a joke

 Quoth TechDirt:

According to the short blurb about the study, 40% of people would rather forward an internet gag such as a video or a rambling joke email than tell a joke themselves.

OK, remember one thing: Gallagher and others weren’t funny  long before the internet.

The study, oddly & allegedly, was paid for by a pork pie maker in the UK, Pork Farm Bowyers.

I say odd and alleged because I can find no trace of this study anywhere on the net except one news story.  I was curious as to why a pork pie maker would spend money on this study and so went looking for it. Turns out the company itself doesn’t exist on the web except in a few local news stories.

I smell a well spiced rat.

Piss & Spit: Just what every tired mom needs

The latest trend in product naming seems to be just this side of gross.

Example A:

Pissed Off! energy drink was the creation of founders Mike Green and Bill Hoovis. These 80 year old seniors had been extremely active their whole life. The past few years , their energy level was getting very low. At the suggestion of Aileen Rodriguez, a fellow business associate and vice president of Pissed Off Products, Mike and Bill tried a variety of energy drinks to help perk them up. After trying different energy drinks, they found that the existing energy drinks on the market did not help them get revitalized. Mike then said “I’m pissed off! I’ll develop an all natural American energy drink that gives people healthy pissed off energy now.”

The site also has trading cards featuring the whole Pissed Off! family.

Example B:

Momspit – No Rinse Cleanser for Hands & Face
Momspit (inspired by the original) is the universal no-rinse cleanser. It’s not a sanitizer and does not contain any alcohol. In fact, it’s gentle enough to use on your face. Momspit foams for easy application, eliminates dirt and grime, and leaves skin moisturized and yummy smelling. It’s the perfect thing to throw in your purse, place on your desk, or keep in your car. To use: Apply a small amount on hands or face and rub in completely. No rinse needed.

At $18 for 7 oz. MomSpit ain’t cheap, which is surprising given the ubiquity of its manufacturer.

I want a food disinfectant called 5 Second Rule.